Silran's Playground

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Who I am

At this point in my life, I'm career oriented with a desire to excel and move forward in my career for any job that fits my required skills sets. I'm also very interested in starting business ventures and have embarked upon my second one with my friend Lance already with hopes that this new one will fulfill a personal and professional dream. Both of these take time and dedication, sometimes to the exclusion of others, this has been a steady progression. I become to responsible never to the point of shirking my responsibilities as a partner to somebody, but the relationship does become hard for some to handle.

I'm to independent, I like my "alone" time, I cherish it. I enjoy the company of friends and I enjoy the bar scene (though it is NOT an overwhelming desire like in my youth). Because of my schedule I tend to plan my social life a week ahead of time. Sometimes, if there is a lull or I am ahead of things, spur of the moment social events become OK. But I'm not one for surprises or for cancellations on the spot, especially if the reason is lame.

I enjoy being single, there is a certain freedom to it that I love. It is something that I and others have discovered and we feel much better for the lack of title and seeming responsibility that comes with the bf/h title. What that does not mean is that I am not a player, a douche or a thug, my feelings on the subject is put up front. There are no lies but there are also no allusions to what will be or not be.

What I am is comfortable in my own skin. I'm not dashing or handsome or fit or young, I am simply me, Manny. I believe myself to be a funny, weird, geeky guy that enjoys a beer or a wine, cheap concerts and musicals. Burger joints and fine restaurants house parties and dinner parties. This is who I am after 43 years, and if I am not comfortable with that then there is something seriously wrong. I have my boundaries and I work at keeping them steadfast in order to protect myself, but that protection allows me the ability to help when I see it is needed and back off when a person's trouble can envelop me. I enjoy my dancing because it exercises my body and my soul and to hell those who mock me about it, your obviously lacking in something yourself. I am not shy about enjoying sex it is an essential part of life, but it is not the driving force of my life. It is slave to me, not me to it. I am a moderate liberal who can be opinionated but who will listen if the argument is sound and will admit my mistakes if I am guilty of them.

What I am is a friend or a good acquaintance, someone you can talk to bullshit with, bounce ideas off of, get advice or have an ear to listen to you. I will help when I can but will only continue if you truly want or need help. I will not be a savior or rescuer to the chronic but will help those who stumble in their path and are fighting to stand up again.

I am an asshole, I am a dick, I am loud, I am a dancer, I am harsh, I am honest, I am kind, I am Grey.

This is who I am and I dare the universe to stop me. It will curtail me, it will make me stumble and it will make me cry, but until I draw my last breath, I will never stop. Even if I should become a quadriplegic I will still have my mind and through that lies a wealth of adventure through imagination.

I assume the mantle given to me by others when they say, "You're Manny."

I'm Manny.

So please walk away if your hoping for something more but please come close if your looking for a friend.

I truly make a lousy bf/h, and that's OK but I felt you should know. :-)